Hello, Andrew. It sounds like you are coming into that “sweet spot” of dynamic tension in which you are nurturing a faith that has stood up to probing questions and yet at the same time is remaining pliable and interdependent with others in a believing community. I like to think of a faith not so much as a rigid, brittle structure so much as a rooted and yet supple tree that can bend in the wind. It is responsive to community and wisdom and challenge from others and yet it remains rooted in Christ. Dry wood that cannot move (i.e. a large and rigid set of extensive dogmas which must all be defended in every detail from any doubt) is the first wood to break in any storm.
Just to generally address several of your points (maybe 2 and 3) you can be sure that you have much good company as you embrace reason and logic as one of the treasures of a faithful mind. Christians are not called to be illogical. It may seem that way with some of the most shrill voices that claim to speak for Christianity today in the west. But historically, and even now --as evidenced by many here on this site for example, it is not so. Even while we are warned not to “lean on our own understandings”, (Proverbs 3:5-60), yet we are asked to provide reasons for our faith, and the Bible tells us of giants of faith who make free use of reasoning to build on a foundation of faith. I think the proverbs passage is about making our own reasoning the foundation in and of itself, whereas, like mathematicians, we need a starting body of axioms on which reasoning can begin to be applied. Those who try to make all human reasoning out to be evil are in the ironic position of using the very reasoning in question to do this. God gave us brains. Rejoice to use yours to its fullest ability, trusting that God is sufficient both in and beyond where our understandings can carry us.
You will never get away from interdependence on others and nor should you. God created us to be in community. The “lone wolf” believer is not the normal or healthy mode of operation for a Christian. That is when “our own understandings” venture furthest out into fringe territory. Atheists are right that this all runs into terrific dangers of group-think, confirmation bias, etc. But all the same there is no escaping it. We simply do not operate in a vacuum, and if we want to experience the Spirit’s movement and guidance we must attend to and fellowship with other believers as we can. “Where two or three are gathered …”. So you can freely give up your quest for independence. Nobody has that.
Paying attention to what nonbelievers think is also valuable, and trying to do so for understanding rather than looking for debate or “gotcha” points. The healthy mind (I suggest) listens to everybody as it can to see what valuable grains can be gleaned even if there is much chaff. And we are then willing to hold at arm’s length that which sounds as if it still needs testing, and also willing to say “I don’t know” instead of blustering in order to look strong. A well-rooted faith isn’t frightened by mystery or even apparent paradox or contradiction, trusting that a present absence of answers does not mean no answers exist. Enough from me for now! Blessings on your day.