To be fair, I read only your OP and none of the comments, but I felt it very important to reach out to you.
I have gone through the very same thing that you are going through. Indeed, in (Christian) college, I was taught Darwinian evolution and methodologial naturalism, resulting in the logical conclusion that God does not exist. I spent the first 30 years of my adult life as an atheist for this very reason.
The good news is, that there are many strong evidences for God’s existence. I am happy to review as many of them with you as you would like, but for now I would like to introduce you to the (very big) problem with theistic evolution:
Let me first ease you mind with a couple disclaimers: I am not young earth and I do not claim that there has been no evolution in the unfolding of life. That said, you and I are by no means alone. There are many, many Christians and former Christians who have recognized this simple fact: the grand claims of evolution and the Bible cannot both be right, because each makes separate truth claims which are mutually exclusive of one another. If one is true, the other cannot be.
I have interacted with many TE or EC apologists in many different threads on this forum, and frankly, they are in denial that there is any problem at all. You and I (and many others) know differently. The only problem that has really been confessed to me has been expressed in the mistaken belief that this all boils down to how one interprets Genesis 1. But it is nowhere near that simple. The fact is that the whole council of God - from Genesis to Revelation - instructs us that not only did God Create us, He Created us through primary, not secondary causation. In other words, He Created us directly. Hands on. Take Genesis 1 completely out of the Bible (which, of course, we cannot and should not), and this fact does not change. For example, in 1st Corinthians 15, Paul tells us that all flesh is not the same flesh; that “there is one kind of flesh of men, another flesh of animals, another of fish, and another of birds” (I Cor 15:39). Luke records a geneology of Jesus which traces back to God himself, concluding, “the son of Seth, the son of Adam, the son of God” (Luke 3:38). Throughout the psalms, we are reminded that God has created us. Indeed, verse 18 of psalm 102 hints that God directly Creates each generation. The entire book of Isaiah contains numerous references to God as Creator. Examine in particular, chapters 43-45. In these three chapters, God alternately pleads with and admonishes Israel through the prophet, emphasizing his role as Creator. You will discover no fewer than a dozen such references in just these three chapters alone. God tells us in every way possible that He has Created us, and that He has done so directly:
(I) created you (43:1)
(I) formed you (43:1)
"Everyone who is called by My name, who I ahve created for My glory. I have formed him, yes, I have created him (43:7)
And so on it goes, through these three chapters. Twice He tells us that he formed us from the womb (44:2 and 44:24), and just in case we still think we can spin this some other way, He offers an analogy of the relationship between the potter and the clay (45:9), an analogy repeated in more direct fashion later in Isaiah (64:8).
It is no surprise at all then, that any objective reader of the Scriptures would conclude that the Bible makes the truth claim that God has Created us and that He has done so directly. According to the grand claims of evolution, life has emerged through purely natural processes. This claim is directly oppostite the perfectly reasonable conclusion offered by the whole counsel of God. Thus it is impossible, or at least logically incoherent, to believe that both can be true.
So we do indeed have a problem here. But could God have “used” evolution"? If so, and if it’s also true that His hand, His undeniable signature, if you will, should be apparent and easily observable