Thanks for sharing so honestly and thoughtfully, Mark.
I grew up Roman Catholic, but in my early university years that faith died out, leaving a husk of confused agnosticism. One night as I walked back to my dorm, a sudden realization came to me: the grand plans of Chris Falter’s future, glorious career of renown were not worth living for. What, then? Another vision: this time, Jesus on the cross. There it was: an example of self-sacrificial love! That was the legacy I wanted to leave!
So I prayed: “Jesus, if you’re real, come into my life and make me like you.” I can’t say my life has been doubt-free or struggle-free since, but I have no regrets–except for those times when I have been selfish.
Interestingly, the movement from YEC to ID to CASE (Christian accepting the science of evolution) started almost a decade later, and took about 25 years.
Best,
Chris