I’m so sorry this happened to you. 
I can imagine it’s frustrating and I don’t blame you for wanting to be able to have some sense for where a church stands on these issues before investing in relationships there.
We recently had a thread about the Clergy Letter Project, which isn’t quite the same thing, but might be of interest:
The cynic in me says that all you’d need to do is avoid churches from conventionally “conservative” denominations, but that’s not really fair, plus lots of churches are nondenominational these days.