Yeah, that is where I wrestle with the matter. Along with your examples, it reminded me of C.S. Lewis’ idea in The Great Divorce. In that model, a bus comes down from heaven every day to help bring people to heaven. There is no general lake of fire, though I suppose people can make their own and generally do what they want including tormenting others. Anyway, no one has to be there if they want to be with God, but people who love the world and don’t like God can eek out a life there for eternity away from God.
It doesn’t address unborn or young children who don’t have a chance, and other quandaries mentioned here about those who don’t believe in Jesus. I largely work from the viewpoint that I am a scientist, so making claims about how God will decide these and who is elect and who is damned is not really something I see a way to assess. I am certainly glad that I am not the one making those sorts of decisions.
I have faith that there is something more, I have faith that Jesus represents a significant part of that something more and can accept that he is the Son if that is what is, and I trust that God is just and will address these difficult questions in a wonderfully better way than we can. Finally, I know that I am weak, so I depend on that walk to perfect me in ways I cannot perfect myself.