We’re getting pretty far afield, but I’ll try to reply briefly. Almost all of the sex offenders whom I knew were abused themselves, even the girls arrested for prostitution or other sex crimes. Yes, it is hard to change behavior that was ingrained in childhood.
If you ask a probation officer, sex offenders are the easiest to deal with. They are used to leading double lives and are masters of deception and manipulation. That is how they find their victims and hide their crimes for many years. Yes, many of them are religious, but the “religious self” is the face they present to the public. So, as it turns out, hiding behind Jesus-speak and God-talk is quite an effective means of disguising one’s true identity.
You’re welcome. It’s why most churches are ill-equipped to deal with abuse, especially when they try to deal with situations in-house. Suspicions or allegations of abuse should be reported to the police, without exception. All professionals who work with children are required to do this by law. The church should do at least as much.
My wife just worked on the protocol for our church. In Michigan, mandated reporters are required to phone everything to CPS immediately. Good insight on that double identity. I sometimes see borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder in myself; I wonder if the duplicity is a characteristic of all of us–and we can fool not just others, but ourselves.
I should’ve said “proper authorities” or something more vague, since laws can vary by state. Mandated reporters know whom to call. For the average person, either one is acceptable, although I would suggest going directly to police when time is of the essence or a serious crime is alleged. CPS isn’t always the quickest to respond.
I wonder if the duplicity is a characteristic of all of us–and we can fool not just others, but ourselves.