My Unbelieving Family (This Makes Me Cry Literally)

My family is unbelieving. Some of my information on my other post was typed wrong by me. I am not banned from having religion, but am made fun of for being more religious. Before late November 2021, I felt more comfortable talking to them about Christianity, but now, I feel so shy to tell them. Even back then I still felt shy. They are Hindus by name, but they aren’t that religious. My parents both seem to believe in God, and my sister seems to not. My mom did go to Catholic school and she is open minded to becoming a Catholic, but only because it’s familiar to her, and it’s all in English. Now I believe in evangelical Christianity, but I do think that if I start to share the Bible with her, she may even become an evangelical Christian, NOT only because of benefits. My dad, however, doesn’t seem like he would consider becoming a Christian. He believes that Christians are stupid when it comes to abortion, who goes to heaven and hell, and global warming, as he believes that the Bible says that we can destroy the environment. My sister doesn’t talk about it much and she believes that if God did exist, her life would be perfect. Please, pray for me! How do I become less shy? And how can I trust God in these situations more? I’ve been praying about this, and there seems to have been no answer yet, and this is making me very worried.


One simple way to become less shy is to simply sit down somewhere nice and comfortable and read the Bible. Let them see you reading, not to show off but to simply get use to being open about your faith in front of them without having to carry on a conversation.


Rohan, I think I remember you are quite young. Now is a good time in your life to learn your faith and grow deep in your relationship with Jesus. Is there someplace for you for fellowship with other Christians, ideally a good church? Is there someone discipling you? Concern yourself now with learning and learning to live your faith in Jesus. Your family will be looking for that.
Worry less about what to say or how or when. Your living will be more important and hard to argue against.


@Rohan ill be praying for you. This is really tough. I also really care about sharing faith with people, but I had to learn how, and it has to do with how and who God made you to be. So I second what @Kendel says, just let yourself learn and grow. And something this important should not end up causing you anxiety and other mental health issues, like it did for me (side note: it didn’t cause them but it sure did exacerbate them). Good things should not torture us, so maybe you will find a way that God made you to share what you want to share with them eventually. Maybe it is the ability to have a conversation, but we also communicate so much with our attitudes and behaviors. And prayer is always a good first step, and we’re here for you :slight_smile:


Sometimes growing in your character and being a loving, helpful son is better than any convincing words you can come up with. It’s not your job to “save” your family, it’s God’s job. It’s also not your job to answer for all the stupid things Christians have done or said, and there is a long list, especially in these fractured times. Do you have a Christian youth group in your town that you go to?

I am going to tag Praveen @praveens even though I am not sure how often he checks into the forum because maybe he has some particular advice as someone who became a Christian from a Hindu family. You can listen to his story of coming to faith on the Language of God podcast, maybe it will be an encouragement to you:


Here is my advice as an unbeliever.

A bit of empathy will go a long way. Ask yourself how you would want to be treated by a family member who happened to belong to a religion you don’t belong to. How would you feel if they tried to convert you to their faith? I would guess that if their attempts were infrequent and not pushy you wouldn’t mind that much. But just think about the line where it changes from friendliness to pushiness.

I have also come up with the “Amway Rule” (this isn’t meant to be derogatory, only instructional). If it is a bad time to try and recruit family members into your multilevel marketing system then it is probably a bad time to try and convert them to your religion.


The wisest thing ever said was this too will pass. Especially as you’re growing up fast.

But in the mean time Rohan, the secret to the thing we all want more than anything, happiness, is gratitude.

There is nothing to worry about. Apart from being the best son, brother, grandson, student, friend you can be.

Haven’t we been here before?

Then if you’re still crying with worry you need to see the school counsellor.

I suspect you’re worried about all your loved ones burning in hell for forever and ever.

That is insane. Not you, but that evil, lying meme that has millions of people gripped by the throat, churning their gut. Love doesn’t do that.

If you’re not worried about that, I can’t imagine what it could possibly be.

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You have been given some good advice here. Honor your parents and get along with your family. You don’t have to convert your family, and certainly not right away. They might come to faith eventually, but be patient. Jesus isn’t itching to send people to hell.

Discuss your different traditions, how they are alike and how they differ. Have you seen the movie “The Life of Pi”? Research into how other mixed-faith families handle their differences.

Actually, some Christians really are stupid about global warming, etc. You can tell your father that Christians have diverse opinions about such things. The Bible doesn’t say we can destroy the environment. Ask your father where he gets that idea.


I mean you trying to force them to convert doesn’t help things much now does it?
So just take it easy and wait it out
They aren’t gonna hold a grudge since I assume they love you.

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The Bible says to subdue the Earth, that everything it has is for you to exploit, apart from bacon.

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Why are you directing your sermon at me?

In Genesis 1:26 God does say:
"“Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals,and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”

But what does that mean to RULE in God’s image and likeness? We have to know who God is. Our worldly, idea of ‘ruling’ is to control, manipulate, get our way, have all the goods, be a Pharaoh, Napoleon, “The Brain” (as in ‘Pinky and’) Jeff Bezos …

Read through the bible and ask God, “tell me about yourself”. And you will see the bible is the story of who God is and how much He loves us, giving us free will to choose to do “as we see fit” or to seek His will. What is His will?

" ’ “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.” This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it: “You shall love your neighbour as yourself.” On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.’ " (Matthew 22:37-40)

But we don’t LOVE each other, our culture confuses love with sex and feeling as it confuses junk food with nourishment. Love is “willing the good of the other as other.” God, the Son had to come to show us what love means. (John 3:16).

“… declares the Sovereign Lord, I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn from their ways and live.” – Ezekiel 33:11

He showed us how to love, submitting to one another, laying aside His King’s crown for a crown of thorns. And giving us a simple command into which all people of all cultures can seek His will.

Jesus rules, He is God, God is Love, He gives the commands as King:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” (John 13:34) ".

And, Christians believe, He will be the judge on judgment day. He knows the very motives of our hearts and all the ways in which we fail to love. That is also why He had to come, because in His death on the cross He paid the price for sin for those who have taken the plea deal and know they are sinners saved only by His grace and work on the cross.

Back to the issue of the environment, to rule is to love; to be good stewards of God’s “good” creation. To care for the plants and animals, the soil and air and ALL His creation.

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Sorry, it was to Klax who wrote about what the bible says “subdue the earth” in response to “some Christians are really stupid about global warming etc. …” and I would certainly agree with that.

Aye, that’s Jesus’ great reversal all right. We still have a long way to go in laying down our privileges.

Perhaps he was being sarcastic

I wasn’t sure, though I have read several of Klax replies now and have a better sense. I don’t know that someone else reading will see it that way so I decided to reply. Historically, the bible has been used or rather misused to justify all kinds of … behavior. I was proposing a different way to think through Genesis as Klax stated.

@Rohan can I ask you what’s causing you to cry?

Because many people can have different religions and if feel safe then its ok. Are you feeling a sense of danger?

I believe we all live forever. So my understanding is we’re learning, as we allow unconditional love in us teach us

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Nope. Fundamentalists are not choosing to be stupid. I didn’t. Like the rest of us their reason is slave to their passions. They have been helplessly subjected to stupefaction of the passions. I was. And nobody, my parents, educators, peers, could speak to my passions with any sense. They were just as stupefied in their own way. Nobody but fundamentalists. We’re all in this together.

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